Time to take a break from the Mavericks and obsess about other sports for a bit (2024)

It’s the dead of the NBA offseason. American football is a little less than a month away, and we’re all in a bit of a post-Olympic stupor. Stephen A. Smith is more involved in enabling Tom Brady to lob potshots at Daniel Jones than lobbing his own at Luka Doncic. I’m still getting used to a reality where the Mavericks are praised for their acumen rather than universally panned by everyone. What a difference the last trade deadline and a Finals run makes!

Though, for me, as a fan of multiple sports, this break in the calendar is the perfect time to switch gears and focus a little bit on my other favourite team, Manchester United, as the Premier League and European club football return from their summer break!

You guys might be thinking that it’s a bit weird that I’m writing about European football on a basketball site, but as a diehard fan of both sports, I thought it might be a fun exercise to draw comparisons between the two clubs — either something about the club or the players themselves.

Note: I understand that a lot of you reading this are already aware of the Premier League and are probably already following/watching it, but bear with me. Please?

If I had to draw a direct literal comparison for Manchester United in the NBA, it would probably be the Celtics. (Although, since 2013, United has been behaving more like the Lakers – big-money signings with no direction and minimal success.) It’s the team with the most success in English Football, with 20 league titles and multiple Domestic Cup trophies — the Celtics connections seem a little on point.

But as a Mavericks fan, that won’t do. So let’s list out the parallels between Manchester United and the Mavericks.

Both have been successful over long periods of time under the guidance of singular visions of revered custodians — Sir Alex Ferguson for Man. Utd. and Don Nelson and Rick Carlisle for the Mavs.

Both were last successful in early 10s - Mavs title in 2011, Man. Utd.’s last League Title in 2013.

Both have been middling to bad over the decade that followed their last title — Man. Utd. was bought by the American Glazer family in 2005 (they also own the Tampa Bay Buccaneers), and they took over football operations completely in 2013 when Sir Alex retired. They then promptly turned the club into a dysfunctional mess. Mark Cuban went a bit nuts in the post-title era, convinced that he was smarter than everyone else.

Both have now had major ownership changes in the past season with very similar structures/mandates – A 27% stake in Man. Utd. was bought by the INEOS group and Sir Jim Ratcliffe with the mandate that he take over football operations in its entirety. Cuban sold a majority stake in the Mavericks but supposedly retained control of basketball operations even as a minority owner. (Later proven otherwise.)

Both are generally food for the take artists (looking at you, ESPN) in the media to get their rocks off, throwing random nonsensical statements around without any real understanding.

See! Similar!

Ok. Maybe not. It was worth a shot!

Those were larger club-level points, though. Maybe not the most convincing of arguments. Maybe comparing the players might have more success? (Only looking at the definite roster players here. Sorry AJ Lawson!)

So here it goes. Starting with....

Kyrie Irving, Comp: Marcus Rashford

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Talented, divisive, and on his best day — one of the best offensive players in the world. Both have the ability to leave you completely speechless when they play to their talent level, and both have suffered through major off-court/field controversies — sometimes self-inflicted. Rashford doesn’t have the same level of consistency that Irving has, though, and has been up and down the past two seasons.

Luka Doncic, Comp: Bruno Fernandes

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While Bruno Fernandes isn’t on the same level as a Footballer that Doncic is as a Basketball player, both are undoubtedly the engines of their respective teams. Both teams go as far as these 2 allow them. Both Doncic and Fernandes are uber-creative passers who enjoy getting their teammates involved. Plus, both a capable of extremely childish histrionics that drive everyone up the wall and allow the media to create endless clickbait deriding them. Fernandes is an absolute Ironman of a player who would rather play through injury than not play at all.

Dereck Lively II, Comp: Kobbie Mainoo

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This may not be about their physical statures (Lively being 7’1”, Mainoo is 6’ flat), but more to do with their potential. Mainoo had a meteoric rise this last season for Man. Utd. (Similar to Lively in the playoffs) to the extent that he’s almost a guaranteed starter for the team, and country following his superlative performance at Euro 2024. He’s still a youngster with a mature head on his shoulders and loads of potential yet to be unlocked. The one difference between Lively and Mainoo, is that Dereck Lively is a mature 4yr old whereas Kobbie Mainoo is a wizened youth.

Klay Thompson, Comp: Casemiro

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A certified winner who’s looking for his last shot at winning trophies before he hangs up his boots. Casemiro is known as being a member of one of the greatest midfield trios at Real Madrid where he won 5 Champions League trophies before the club decided to move on from him to get younger. While Casemiro has now been at United for 2 seasons and is more known for his defense and Thompson just got to Dallas and is an offensive specialist – Both are looking to prove that they are still capable contributors to title winning teams.

P.J. Washington, Comp: Rasmus Hojlund

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While Hojlund is a striker and is primarily an offensive player, his energy and willingness to do the dirty work also helps the team out. Both him and Washington are incredibly streaky players who need to add more to their game to become surefire regular contributors.

Daniel Gafford, Comp: Scott McTominay

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A bit of a stretch here. Both are technically supposed to be more defensive players but can provide surprising offensive contributions in the right situation. McTominay scored 10 goals last season for United – to the extent that they started using him primarily as an offensive threat that the other teams had to keep an eye on. Like Gafford’s contributions as a roll man, the effectiveness of which surprised everyone. Gafford’s beloved by Mavs fans though, while McTominay’s a bit meh.

Naji Marshall, Comp: Lisandro Martinez

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Mr. Knife. Meet the Butcher. That’s Lisandro Martinez’s nickname by the way. (So freaking cool!) A fan favourite defender whose aggression and no BS attitude has endeared him to the fanbase like not many players have in recent memory. For English people to voluntarily shout out “Argentina! Argentina!” Like they do for Martinez in the stadiums, it means something. (UK-Argentina relations haven’t great politically since the Falklands war (Looks like watching The Crown was good for something) and not great on the pitch either since the David Beckham-Diego Simeone incident at the World Cup in 1998) The Butcher really lives up to his moniker, like we all hope the Knife does to his.

Jaden Hardy, Comp: Amad Diallo

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Both are attackers on the smaller side who are more known for their potential than their contributions. Hardy showed flashes at the end of the season and in the playoffs, while Amad took advantage of injuries at the end of last season to get a run in the team and raise expectations. Both are also at the stage where they should be moved on if they don’t find a definite place in their squads.

Quentin Grimes, Comp: Diogo Dalot

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Another stretch (I’m considering the NY Knicks Grimes from 2 seasons ago. Not the Detroit version) Both are primarily defenders who offer some potential in attack. While Dalot has improved year on year to become one of the stalwarts of the United defense, Grimes has the potential to provide a key role in doing the same – Just maybe not to the same extent.

Dante Exum, Comp: Christian Eriksen

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Exum played so well last year and there was so much hope leading into the playoffs, where he laid a complete goose-egg. It’s now gotten to the point where, in some ways, we’re questioning whether he has a role in the team. Eriksen is similar. A value signing 2 years ago- He was indispensable in running the United offense and creating for others in the league against weaker opposition. When it came to the big games though, nada. Eriksen though deserves plaudits for continuing to play even after he suffered a heart attack on the pitch and nearly died during Euro 2020.

Maxi Kleber, Comp: Luke Shaw

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Both are superb defenders who theoretically can be offensive contributors. Both are also almost always injured for large parts of the season. It’s gotten to the point where the availability of both in their respective teams is a bonus and maybe it’s time to move on.

Dwight Powell, Comp: Harry Maguire

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Mavs and United fanbases have very mixed feelings about Powell and Maguire respectively. Both had significant starting roles till a couple of seasons ago which is more than they probably should have. Harry Maguire was the most expensive defender in the world at one point, which will never be said about Powell. That being said, both play much better for their national teams than they do for their club. One gets hit in the face too much while the others’ nickname is “Slabhead”.

Olivier-Maxence Prosper, Comp: Harry Amass

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A young defender whose still got a ways to go before he can play a significant part of the rotation. We’re probably still looking at another year or so before both these guys can become regulars. Amass is a 17 year old (!!!) who’s worked hard enough that he’s in consideration for some opportunities in the coming season.

Spencer Dinwiddie, Comp: Antony Dos Santos

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Creative, but limited offensive players who say and do incredibly stupid things. Antony was a solid player 2 seasons ago when he first came to United but has since evolved into a player the fanbase doesn’t particularly care much for. Both players, on their day, may provide something but the team doesn’t particularly get affected even if they’re not playing.

So what do you think? Similar or not? I’m biased here, but I couldn’t shake the thought once it got stuck in my head. So in a lot of ways, this is me trying to rationalise it all.

If you also follow the Premier League or any other European Football team - What are your team/ player comparisons if not Manchester United? (Arsenal and Liverpool fans – Stay far away!)

If you don’t watch European Football, you should! It’s typically quick, flowing and entertaining and crazily addictive. The matches usually last around 2-2.5 hours including half time amd the fans of clubs are even more tribal than those in American sports. If it’s the Premier League, then it’s usually on NBC Sports (Or Peaco*ck which Kirk can’t praise enough) starting between 7:30AM ET and 10AM ET. A fun way to start weekends!